Confidently You

Tag: personal growth

  • From Completion to Creation: Reconditioning Myself for What’s Next

    From Completion to Creation: Reconditioning Myself for What’s Next

    Hey gorgeous,

    Yes, the title of our blog today is “From Completion to Creation: Reconditioning Myself for What’s Next”

    I don’t know about you, but these past three months have been a whirlwind of decisions, endings, and fresh starts for me.
    And if there’s one thing I’ve learned — it’s that big decisions take big courage.

    And yes… it’s okay to be scared.
    I used to think fear meant I was doing something wrong. Like maybe I missed a sign somewhere or maybe I wasn’t ready.
    But the truth is… fear often shows up right when you’re about to grow into the next level of yourself.
    And right now? I’m stepping into a brand new chapter of my life.

    Is it uncertain? Absolutely.
    Am I terrified sometimes? 1000%.
    But here’s the surprising thing…
    There’s a quiet peace in me, too.
    It’s like deep down, even with all the unknowns, I know it’s going to work out. Maybe not perfectly. Maybe not the way I thought. But it’s going to unfold in the way it’s meant to.

    Now — let’s be honest here — do I wake up every day overflowing with positive energy?
    No, gorgeous, I would be lying if I said that.
    Some days, I wrestle with doubt. Some days, I wonder if I made the right moves.
    But I also know this: it’s not about pretending fear doesn’t exist — it’s about choosing how I respond to it.

    And that’s what I want to share with you today —
    How I’m handling this new chapter in my life… and maybe, just maybe, it can help you if you’re approaching one too.

    Because let’s be real — we all face new chapters.
    We all have moments when the path ahead feels blurry and uncertain.
    And you know what? It’s okay to feel scared.
    What’s not okay is letting fear keep us stuck.
    We are not meant to shrink. We are meant to expand, grow, and become.

    Here’s what’s been helping me recondition myself for what’s next:

    1. Flip the Script

    Instead of focusing on what could go wrong…
    I intentionally ask myself,
    “But what if it goes right?”

    When my mind tries to spiral into worst-case scenarios, I breathe and remind myself:
    Possibility lives right next door to fear.
    Every time you think of what could break, think about what could be built instead.

    2. See Fear as Progress

    I’ve started seeing fear as a green light instead of a red one.
    If something feels scary but exciting? That’s usually my soul telling me,
    “Gorgeous, you’re growing. Keep going.”

    Comfort zones are cozy… but nothing extraordinary ever happens there.
    Now, I see fear and think,
    “Oh, this must be important. This must be next.”

    3. Get Crystal Clear on What You Want

    I had to get brutally honest with myself:
    What do I actually want to see happen in the next few months?

    Vague dreams create vague results.
    So I wrote it down. I spoke it out loud. I painted a clear picture.
    Because if you can’t define it… how will you ever know if you’re walking toward it?

    4. Create Accountability You Actually Like

    It’s easy to set goals and then let life distract you.
    So I asked myself,
    “How can I make it easier to stay on track?”
    For me, that looks like:

    • Having a few trusted people check in with me.
    • Setting small deadlines I actually celebrate.
    • Making reminders for myself that feel like encouragement, not punishment.

    Accountability isn’t about beating yourself up.
    It’s about building structures that support the version of you you’re becoming.

    Gorgeous, if you are entering a new chapter too… I want you to hear me clearly:

    You are not behind.
    You’re not late.
    You’re exactly where you need to be to grow into your next season.

    Fear doesn’t mean stop.
    It means you’re on the edge of something bigger than you’ve known before.
    And you, my love, deserve to step into it fully.

    Remember, as my mentor Dr. John C. Maxwell said. Growth doesn’t happen by accident.
    It happens because we are willing to recondition our minds, our habits, and our hearts…
    even when it’s scary, even when it’s uncertain, even when no one else sees the dream but you.

    This is your season to complete what needed to end —
    and create what your soul has been waiting for.

    You’re ready.
    You’re doing it.
    And I’m so proud of you.

    With you every step of the way,

    -Ernelita

  • Winning Starts with Believing that You Will Win

    Winning Starts with Believing that You Will Win

    Hi there gorgeous! Gosh, writing a blog every month can be impactful. I am now realizing how much I’ve missed writing. And I sure hope you’ve missed my writing as well. The title of our blog post today is, “Winning starts with believing that you will win!”

    Now, if you have been following me for quite some time, you may have heard that my co-host and I launched our international radio show called, “The Leader’s Edge.” And you can learn a bit more about it from one of my previous blog posts, “The Leader You Aim to be is in You”

    Chaz Gates, the COO and co-founder of Wondry Wine, is our special guest for today’s episode on the radio show. And the title of his radio show episode is “The Calvary Always Comes”. Feel free to listen to it, after reading this blog first.

    Now, I will not share the whole show with you, but I will share one of the messages that he shared on the show. This message is a very good reminder for me, and I just realized that it tied in with the movie that I watched this evening, called “Champions” with actor “Woody Harrelson.” I highly recommend it if you have not had a chance to see it.

    Now, I will not spoil the movie either but the message I have gathered is, “winning starts with the belief that you will win.”

    Sometimes we are so busy setting goals, wishing to achieve something, and taking action, that we forget the most important thing, and because of this, we put a cap on our abilities. But if we practice the belief that we will win, that is half of the battle.

    Why? Because believing that you will win helps you stay focused on the goal

    Believing that you will win helps you stay focused on the goal

    Gorgeous, your energy is valuable! Read that again! I know that fears, limiting beliefs, and inner critics exist. And entertaining these fears all the time can suck the energy out of you. But what if, you focus your energy knowing and believing that you’ve already won? Isn’t that a feel-good moment? Wouldn’t you want to feel good instead of dealing with the negative thoughts and emotions that your fears invoke?

    I learned this along the way of my journey and Chaz shared it on the show too, if we work hard, treat whatever it is that we are working on as our baby. Invest every day, what do you think would be the end result? Success right?

    In the book In-Vision by my great friend Niel Magsombol, he said, “Our visions are a glimpse of the future.” Now, in order for that vision to become a reality, you have to believe that it is already yours. It is already in existence, you just have to work on existing in that glimpse of the future.

    Too good to be true? I know! But let me ask you this, what are you currently working towards? Maybe building a business. Working overseas. Or working your way up to your dream job. All these things, at some point in time you had a vivid image of what it looks like. That is your vision.

    Now, if the vision is in your mind, why is it so hard to see that it is already done? Why is it a challenge to put yourself in it? It is because we lack the belief that it is possible.

    How do you start believing? I have my teaching about confidence that having confidence starts with having the courage to take thought into action and repeatedly do it all over again.

    There are three sources of courage which is where belief comes from:

    1. 1. Belief in yourself – right now, you may not have a lot but hey, this is why you are reading this blog post right? You are working on improving your mindset
    2. 2. Belief from others – this could be the faith and support coming from your friends, family, or a mentor
    3. 3. Belief in a higher power – this is where your faith is; it could be Jesus, Buddha, etc.

    So there you have it, how winning starts with believing that you’ve already won, and where you can start getting that belief.

    Another blog post in the books and if you found value in this blog post, share it with someone who may benefit from it. It’s the only way we can spread these tools to others.

  • Everyone Deserves to be Lead Well (IMC 2023)

    Everyone Deserves to be Lead Well (IMC 2023)

    Hi there gorgeous!!! This past week was just a fun and fulfilling week for me. John C. Maxwell said, “Everyone Deserves to be Lead Well.” He is right! You, me, and everyone else in this world deserve to be led well.

    I was blessed to have the opportunity to attend our August International Maxwell Conference in Florida. It is where all Maxwell Certified Team Members meet every March and August. Our mentor, Chris Robinson said, “Stay close to the fire” which motivated me to make a commitment and join again this year and I am grateful that I did.

    The Maxwell Leadership Group is Dr. John C. Maxwell’s (Papa John) Legacy. As of today, we have 48,000 members around the world who are certified in the path that they have chosen. Each and every member are promised that they will be led well through this organization and we have been.

    The faculty, the mentors, and Papa John himself always over-deliver. The International Maxwell Conference (IMC) alone was perfect proof of it. It is a three-day event for members to meet, learn, network, and grow together.

    For the most part, we are all led well because of the following things:

    • We have an assigned “Growth Day” for all members and non-members of the organization. This day is full of motivational keynote speeches from well-known speakers and our mentors. It is also a day where we can network and add value to others outside of the organization.
    • The second day and third day is more intimate since it is exclusive for members only. There more teachings are done, along with other activities specific to the lane of our choice and status of membership.
    • New relationships are built and strengthen the relationships that we already had. I have met so many new people at this conference that I have built friendships and if not family. Sometimes the notion of being in a cult comes to mind. It may be true or not, but I must say the energy was just electrifying and motivating.

    I am writing this blog post because I wanted to give you a brief update on my life and at the same time, give you a snippet of my growth journey. With this though, I wanted to challenge you today with these questions:

    -What are you doing today for your personal growth?

    -How are you leading yourself or are you being led well in your environment?

    -What can you do to improve your current environment?

    -Are you surrounding yourself with like-minded people who can help you in your own personal growth?

    Feel free to respond in the comments below with your answer and I’m excited to hear from you.

  • The Leader you aim to be is in YOU.

    The Leader you aim to be is in YOU.

    Hello, there gorgeous! Today, I wanted to share an outstanding achievement with you and also help you realize that the leader you aim to be is in you.

    I must say, I look forward to building these blog posts for you every time. I have my ‘deep focus’ playlist in the background, as I lean back and let my fingers type away.

    I am happy to announce that my co-host and I are launching our very first radio show through Voice America Business Channel. We named the radio show, The Leader’s Edge.

    To be honest with you, this next chapter of my life is just surreal for me. Because imagine all I wanted to do is become an International Motivational Teacher, and now here is a platform that can help me do that.

    The mission of our radio show is…

    We want to attract, motivate, inspire, and add value to aspiring leaders and/or seasoned leaders, who will in turn multiply value to others. We want to be a catalyst for the transformation of these leaders to change the world around them!”

    – The Leader’s Edge

    Now, you are probably saying, “Ernie, I am not a leader. I don’t have a leadership role at work.” This is where the teaching starts.

    According to my mentor, Dr. John C. Maxwell, “Leadership is influence. Nothing more, nothing less.”

    If you have influence, you are a leader. There are different types of leaders which is something that we will not talk about today. But to some it all up, if you are influencing someone, then you are a leader. That could be, influencing your family, your co-workers, and/or yourself.

    You see, the hardest person to lead is ‘yourself’ because you tend to make yourself last. Analyze this for me, I challenge you to assess your actions toward yourself. On days, that you want to do something but decided to stay home instead. Giving and helping others but when it comes to doing things for you, you turn away. This is because we are conditioned that taking care of ourselves first is selfish.

    I am here to tell you that it is not. And to be honest, leading starts with YOU. Just like what I had shared in my previous blog post, “You are authentic, just the way you are.” It all starts within you.

    Our vision

    Our radio show’s vision is to show our audience, YOU, the work, that happens in a leader’s life behind closed doors. The personal growth that they have to go through and still going through in their leadership journey.

    Sometimes, leaders, founders, and successful people are put on a pedestal because of what people see as “success.” But has anyone asked, what these so-called leaders or successful individuals have to go through in order to get there? The pain, the doubts, the adjustments, and the failures. All those things happen in the dark. It all happens when everyone has gone home and the work is done.

    So, gorgeous, in your battle, I am here to tell you, that the leader you aim to be is in YOU. It is something that you can unleash, reveal, and hone.

    With that, I would like to ask for your support on our radio show, “The Leader’s Edge”, as we aim to teach you tangible tools on how to lead. May that be leading a corporation or leading yourself.

    If you find value in this blog post please share it with others, because it’s the only way we will spread the knowledge.

    Always remember, be Bold, be Radiant, and be Confidently You!

  • Quick ways to handle the “Inner Voice” in your head

    Quick ways to handle the “Inner Voice” in your head

    Last night I had to opportunity to watch three amazing women speak at The Rising Stars Speaker Series. It is a local event that happens every couple of months and they bring speakers to speak at the event. One of the speakers, Keerthi Kathi, spoke about the inner voice which motivated me to write this blog post. “Quick ways to handle the “Inner Voice in your head.

    What is an Inner Voice?

    The conversation that you have with yourself is the most important conversation that you will have all day

    – John Maxwell

    Yes, you are probably asking, “what is an inner voice?” An inner voice is also known as the internal dialogue that you have within yourself. These are voices that whisper when you are about to leave your comfort zone. Most of the time, it questions you or makes decisions for you.

    In my personal development journey, I have learned that inner voices are hardwired in us from our childhood experiences. To some extent, it’s from our childhood traumas.

    Are inner voices bad? If you asked me 5 years ago, I would say, yes! But having the experience and knowledge that I have now. It’s quite the contrary.

    How? Well, an inner voice is designed to protect you from experiencing the same pain. Or having the same reaction to a similar situation that happened in the past. See, it has good intentions. But the downside is, it can prevent you from taking the next step.

    Remember my blog post, “Reasons why Personal Growth has to start within?” If not, click the hyperlink. Personal growth has to start within to battle or to handle our fears and limiting beliefs. And this one of them.

    How do I use my inner voice nowadays? I use it as a guide to my growth. So let’s dive in, on how you can handle it too.

    Simple ways how to Handle Inner Voice in your head

    1. Listen to it
    2. Ask yourself “what does it make me feel?”
    3. Do I want to continue feeling this way?
    4. What can I do to stop feeling this way?
    5. When can I start doing something about it?

    Listen to it

    Keerthi’s speech was titled “Congratulations, You are not good enough!” This speech was structured so well that gave the negative phrase a positive meaning.

    “You are not good enough”, is an example of an inner voice. When approached with something that is unusual or new for us. This inner voice usually comes up. In her story, she shared that she had this inner voice growing up. But she was able to push it to the side so that it became dormant. Until she was faced with a new task… being a mother. Being a mother is definitely hard, but a very fulfilling role. I related to her story because I too am a mother. And I didn’t know what I was doing.

    I had so many inner voices about it. “You are a bad mom!”, “You think you are ready for this?” The list goes on. How I handled it? Do the best I can.

    How Keerthi is handling hers right now is, she decided to listen to it. Instead of pushing it under a rug. She decided to face it.

    Ask yourself “what does it make me feel?”

    Here’s the coaching aspect of it. Ask yourself, “what does it make me feel?” Tough right? Bare with me though. This is necessary. For years we are told that if you get scared or faced with fear. Like an inner voice questioning you. To suck it up and move on. Wear your big girl or big boy pants and just move on. And I am here to tell you, that is the wrong way. Entertain it. Feel it. Accept it.

    “What does it make you feel?” Well mostly, crappy. It makes you feel unmotivated. Weak. Helpless even.

    Do I want to continue feeling this way? (Inner voice can cripple you)

    Well, the answer to this next question is obvious, right? Of course not. We do not want to continue feeling unmotivated. Helpless. Or stuck. As I said, your inner voice can cripple you. Or stop you from taking action right? This question is important. Do you want it to continue doing so? I hope your answer is, NO!

    What can I do to stop feeling this way?

    In Keerthi’s story, her inner voice saying, “You are not good enough”, she used the changing diaper situation. Apparently, she keeps failing to change her baby’s diaper without getting pee’d on. A friend of hers asked her a question that changed her mindset. The question was, “What do you do when you don’t know how to change the diaper?” So, simple right? But it’s again, that inner voice has the power to make the easy to the hardest thing in the world. So, she googled how to change diapers, and is now a pro at it.

    Same thing with you gorgeous. When an inner voice comes around, ask yourself the questions I have given you so far. And this question is important, “What can I do to stop feeling this way?” This calls for you to take action. Do your own research. Practice. Ask for help. Do something that can help you improve and learn more about the task at hand. Remember, it is all about growing and improving yourself.

    When can I start doing something about it?

    The answer is now! It is not later. It is not tomorrow. Next month or whenever. It is now!

    “The longer you wait to do something you should do now, the greater the odds that you will never actually do it.”

    – Jim Rohn

    As Jim Rohn explained the Law of Diminishing Intent, “The longer you wait to do something you should do now, the greater the odds that you will never actually do it.”

    Again, all results will come when backed up by action. So, once you’ve learned what needs to be done to overcome your inner voice. Do not wait. Do it now.

    There you have it gorgeous! Simple ways to handle your inner voice. Please share this if you found value in this blog post. I would love other people to benefit from it as well. And as always, I would love to hear how this blog post had made an impact on your life. Feel like to shoot me a message and share.

  • Reasons why personal growth has to start within

    Reasons why personal growth has to start within

    Have you started your personal growth? If not let me start with personal growth has to start within. What do I mean by that? Personal growth is not accessible in school and is not made aware to everyone. As a result, I made it a mission to make it known on my own page.

    What is Personal Growth?

    Personal Growth is you growing yourself. It can be emotional, mental, or physical. Learning a different perspective to tackle day-to-day adversities. And learning to have a different outlook on life. Personal Growth will teach you to test your own limits and introduce you to your own capacity.

    Now, that you have an idea of what personal growth is in my own definition. Let’s go back to reasons why personal growth has to start within.

    In my own journey, I didn’t know that personal growth has to start within. I was doing the work. Learning new things but it’s just knowledge. Yet I found myself treating each task in my personal development journey as a chore. It’s not something that I loved. Not even close to liking it.

    Why? Because I didn’t know the capacity of what I am learning. I wasn’t mindful of what was truly happening in the personal growth process. It almost felt like I was shooting bullets with no target.

    It is not until I learned that it has to be intentional. Personal growth has to start within me. Let me explain why below.

    Reasons why personal growth has to start within

    • You have to know your reason for personal growth

    You have to accept that you need personal growth

    • You need to learn where personal growth is applied

    You have to know your reason for personal growth

    Again this is going back to being intentional. It has to start within you as to why you need personal growth.

    In my previous blog post, “9 Unheard Ways to achieve greater personal growth”. I shared the first one as starting with awareness.

    And that starts within you. The majority of the people in the world practice the definition of insanity.

    “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”

    Albert Einstein

    My reason for diving into personal growth initially because I was tired of hiding. My insecurities always got the best of me. Knowing that I am capable of doing something but my limiting beliefs had always kept me on the sidelines. And I know that in order to change something. I need to start within and tell myself I need to change.

    I challenge you to ask yourself, what is your reason to grow? Start within yourself and ask that question.

    You have to accept that you need personal growth

    Why? Because you may know within you that you need to grow. But there will be times when you will question it. Or second, guess it even. Personal growth starts within and it comes with accepting that it is needed. For a long time, I knew I needed to grow but I didn’t know that having to accept it is part of the process.

    Full acceptance that I need personal growth gave me that commitment. That the things that I need to go through in order to grow are not just tasks. They are needed to help me grow. As a result, I saw progress. I retain the information. And my growth became apparent not just within me. But other people around me noticed it as well.

    You need to learn where personal growth is applied

    Yes, gorgeous. Start within. That is where personal growth is applied. All the things that you will learn will challenge you to become uncomfortable. And that is the whole point. But you cannot pick and choose where to apply personal growth if you’ve learned to have a better mindset, great. If you have learned how to gain confidence in talking with other people. And choosing not to use it. It is a disservice to yourself.

    Personal growth is only effective if you have committed to learning and applying the knowledge.

    One thing I have learned from John Maxwell was, “You have to be comfortably uncomfortable.” And when you do, the reward is indescribable.

    So, there you have it, three reasons why personal growth has to start within. Please share this post and tag me if you found it valuable. It’s the only way we can spread knowledge.