Confidently You

Tag: you have the power

  • Winning Starts with Believing that You Will Win

    Winning Starts with Believing that You Will Win

    Hi there gorgeous! Gosh, writing a blog every month can be impactful. I am now realizing how much I’ve missed writing. And I sure hope you’ve missed my writing as well. The title of our blog post today is, “Winning starts with believing that you will win!”

    Now, if you have been following me for quite some time, you may have heard that my co-host and I launched our international radio show called, “The Leader’s Edge.” And you can learn a bit more about it from one of my previous blog posts, “The Leader You Aim to be is in You”

    Chaz Gates, the COO and co-founder of Wondry Wine, is our special guest for today’s episode on the radio show. And the title of his radio show episode is “The Calvary Always Comes”. Feel free to listen to it, after reading this blog first.

    Now, I will not share the whole show with you, but I will share one of the messages that he shared on the show. This message is a very good reminder for me, and I just realized that it tied in with the movie that I watched this evening, called “Champions” with actor “Woody Harrelson.” I highly recommend it if you have not had a chance to see it.

    Now, I will not spoil the movie either but the message I have gathered is, “winning starts with the belief that you will win.”

    Sometimes we are so busy setting goals, wishing to achieve something, and taking action, that we forget the most important thing, and because of this, we put a cap on our abilities. But if we practice the belief that we will win, that is half of the battle.

    Why? Because believing that you will win helps you stay focused on the goal

    Believing that you will win helps you stay focused on the goal

    Gorgeous, your energy is valuable! Read that again! I know that fears, limiting beliefs, and inner critics exist. And entertaining these fears all the time can suck the energy out of you. But what if, you focus your energy knowing and believing that you’ve already won? Isn’t that a feel-good moment? Wouldn’t you want to feel good instead of dealing with the negative thoughts and emotions that your fears invoke?

    I learned this along the way of my journey and Chaz shared it on the show too, if we work hard, treat whatever it is that we are working on as our baby. Invest every day, what do you think would be the end result? Success right?

    In the book In-Vision by my great friend Niel Magsombol, he said, “Our visions are a glimpse of the future.” Now, in order for that vision to become a reality, you have to believe that it is already yours. It is already in existence, you just have to work on existing in that glimpse of the future.

    Too good to be true? I know! But let me ask you this, what are you currently working towards? Maybe building a business. Working overseas. Or working your way up to your dream job. All these things, at some point in time you had a vivid image of what it looks like. That is your vision.

    Now, if the vision is in your mind, why is it so hard to see that it is already done? Why is it a challenge to put yourself in it? It is because we lack the belief that it is possible.

    How do you start believing? I have my teaching about confidence that having confidence starts with having the courage to take thought into action and repeatedly do it all over again.

    There are three sources of courage which is where belief comes from:

    1. 1. Belief in yourself – right now, you may not have a lot but hey, this is why you are reading this blog post right? You are working on improving your mindset
    2. 2. Belief from others – this could be the faith and support coming from your friends, family, or a mentor
    3. 3. Belief in a higher power – this is where your faith is; it could be Jesus, Buddha, etc.

    So there you have it, how winning starts with believing that you’ve already won, and where you can start getting that belief.

    Another blog post in the books and if you found value in this blog post, share it with someone who may benefit from it. It’s the only way we can spread these tools to others.

  • 4 Easy Questions to ask yourself in goal setting

    4 Easy Questions to ask yourself in goal setting

    Today, I wanted to talk about “4 easy questions to ask yourself in goal setting”.

    We are halfway through the first month of the year. I am sure you have set your goals either at the beginning of January or maybe the end of December. Halfway through the first month is when the determination slowly dies down. I have observed this myself. And to be honest, I have fallen off of what I set for myself to do before.

    I will be honest, goal setting is easy, but it is starting and keeping up with it that is a challenge. And if you are experiencing it, it is okay. It happens to all of us.

    But what I have learned is you have to ask yourself 4 questions when setting your goals. These 4 questions had helped me tremendously to take the path that I want. And focus on it.

    I learned these questions from reading the book, “Developing the Leader within you 2.0” by Dr. John Maxwell. Dr. John Maxwell shared these questions in the book. The questions were a response to a question asked by the author Danny Cox to a graduate student who became a successful entrepreneur, not just once but twice!

    What do I really want?

    When it’s time to set goals, you must ask yourself, “What do ‘I’ really want?”. Notice the letter ‘I”? That means, what “YOU” want. Not what your parents want. Not your partner. Nor your friends. It is what you want.

    Why? Because working towards what “YOU” want leads to your happiness. It will give you a sense of fulfillment. And the thought of ‘you are doing it for ‘you’ will give you that ease that whatever adversity comes your way is bearable.

    What will it cost?

    I love this question when goal setting. Why? Because this removes the “BS” and tells what I am going to face. I know that something has to give. There will be a cost. Cost doesn’t always mean money. Though that is a part of it. Cost also means time. Effort. Hard work. Sweat. Tears. Late nights. Early mornings. Long hours. Forgetting where you put your lunch. (This is me).

    Knowing that achieving your goals will require work makes it easier to face them.

    Am I willing to pay the price?

    Now, knowing the amount of work is one thing. This question confirms if you have the “Do whatever it takes” mindset as Gary Vee says. Are you willing to pay the price for the set goals you made for yourself?

    Meaning are you willing to put in the work, every day and every night? Are you willing to remove watching TV from your routine and read books instead?

    Are you willing to cut down on sugar in your diet to reach the weight you wanted to lose?

    These are examples of the price that you may have to pay, depending on what journey you plan to reach. So, again, “Are you willing to pay the price?

    If your answer is yes, then ask the next question.

    When should I start paying the price?

    When should you start paying the price to reach your set goals?

    I thought you’d never ask. The answer is NOW.

    Not later. Nor tomorrow. Not next week. Or even wait for next month. Start Now.

    Why? According to the Law of Diminishing intent by Dr. John Maxwell. Our hunger, motivation, or inspiration into starting anything will diminish if we don’t take action toward it right away.

    Now, I ask these questions at the very beginning of my goal setting, but in times when I have no motivation. I don’t feel like doing what I am supposed to do. Guess what?

    I ask these questions to myself again. Why? Because it reminds me of the set goals I have for myself. What it takes to get the results that I aim for. My commitment to setting the goal. Last but not the least, when should I take action to achieve those goals.

    I challenge you to ask yourself these 4 questions. Whether you’re starting your goal-setting journey. Or somewhere in the middle and slowly falling into the cracks. Like I’ve said before, we can bend. We can rest. Even take a break, but we can NEVER. GIVE. UP.

  • Impeccable reasoning behind the question, “Why not You?”

    Impeccable reasoning behind the question, “Why not You?”

    Why not you? In this blog post, I wanted to give you the impeccable reasoning behind the question, why not you?

    It is my greatest dream to write a book that will make an impact on a lot of people. And I’ve decided that the title of my first book will be, “Why not you?”.

    “Why”, you ask?

    “Because why not?”

    Think about this for a second. Sometimes, when you see something that you want to do. Something that you’re really interested in. The first thing you do is talk yourself out of it.

    You may not agree with me, but let me give you an example.

    Seeing beautiful pictures on social media. This gives you the desire to travel there too. Yet, the first thing that comes to mind is, “I don’t have the money”. You just talked yourself out of it.

    Robert Kiyosaki explained the difference between a winner and loser mindset. The winner mindset finds out a way to solve the problem. The loser mindset, states the problem and stops there. A little harsh but sometimes, we do need some tough love.

    So, using the same example above, if you wanted to travel, “why not?”

    You are probably rolling your eyes at me as you read this. But let me explain with the following reasons below.

    The reasoning behind the question, “Why not You?”

    • You have a burning desire to do it, why not you?
    • You’re capable of doing it
    • Your will to learn and take action will help you
    • Other people have the same fears, yet still, did it, so why not you?

    You have a burning desire to do it

    Going back to the same example above, you have a burning desire to travel.

    Yes, yes, I get it, money is the problem. But you can save money though right?

    In my blog post, “You are what you are meant to be”, I used Eleanor Rooseve’ts words. “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent”. So, in that sense, if you are letting money stop you from doing what you want to do. Then you are giving it consent to make you feel inferior.

    Knowing you, you are more capable than that. This leads us to the next reason behind the question, “why not you?”

    You’re capable of doing it

    Like me, I am confident that you know within you that you are capable. And you can apply this to any aspect of your life. You don’t give yourself enough credit though.

    I wanted you to stop for a second and reflect on every hardship. Every struggle. Even the problems that you never thought you will never get out of. You got through them. Think about that. If you were capable of going through those problems, struggles, and trials. What is different from what you are facing now? It’s just another problem, right?

    I saw this movie yesterday called, The Grayman on Netflix. Ryan Gosling was the main actor there, as a trained assassin. He used the phrase, “It’s just another Thursday”, to give Claire (actress in the movie), assurance that everything will be okay. An impeccable mindset to have before he faces his opponent.

    I plan to apply that in my life whenever I feel stuck. It’s just another Thursday. Just like, it’s just a regular day. Then figure out how to solve the problem.

    And guess what? YOU.CAN.TOO!

    You are capable! So, why not you?

    Your will to learn and take action will help you

    Again, why not you?

    “I don’t know how,” you say.

    Yes, I know, you may not see the path now, but it’s okay.

    One thing I learned in my journey is, that I don’t have to have all the answers.

    And I would like to let you in on a secret. Part of manifestation is co-creation. If you believe in God, the universe, or whatever faith you have. You co-create.

    I co-create with my God. I take action based on what I can. And my will to learn. Now the path is my God’s part of co-creating. He leads the way.

    So, in your scenario, I recommend using this concept. Learn as much as you can. Take action to your capabilities. And whatever is unclear right now. Ask for guidance.

    Other people have the same fears, yet still, did it, so why not you?

    There is probably at some point of you reading this post where your mind is screaming. Saying, “No, Ernie, you don’t understand.”

    The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.

    -Steve Jobs

    I may not understand what your mind is telling you right now. But here is what I know. Those voices in your head. Those are what we call, “False evidence appearing real”, a.k.a. FEAR.

    And to tell you the truth, we all have it. Again, as I said, before you can even come up with a solution to taking action, you have talked yourself out of it. That is your fear.

    Lisa Nichols shared in one of her speeches that she was given the response by one of her clients and said, “I’ve always been this way.” And her response was, “How is that working out for you?” And that hit me.

    We can make that comment, but how is our mindset? How is our decision towards the things that we desire to do working out for us?

    If your answer is, that it’s not working out. Then, take action. Make a change. Give yourself permission to try!

    Other people who had made it did it scared. Why not you?

    Now, the intention of this blog post is to empower you. To show you that you have options. Help you realize that you are capable. But at the end of the day, when all the noise is gone.

    Reflect and ask yourself, “Why not me?”

  • You are what you are meant to be!

    You are what you are meant to be!

    I will repeat this again, “You are what you are meant to be! This may sound unclear but let me explain it.

    Before I do, this blog post is more of a pep talk. And I would like to reflect on a quote that inspired me to type this blog post.

    No one can make you feel inferior without your consent

    Eleanor Roosevelt

    Why did I choose this quote?

    Call me an overachiever. But one of the most important things that you need to reach whatever you desire is “courage”.

    That’s it! It is not talent. Not hard work. And definitely not knowledge. It is having the courage.

    I was discussing this with a friend a few days ago and he did not agree with me. I have this quote that I created which goes…

    Life is worth living, you just have to have the courage to live it

    Ernelita Dacumos

    I say “courage” because we will face a lot of struggles in life. We will feel uncomfortable when we work towards our desires. But you know what will get you through it? Courage!

    It’s been working for me so far. I am confident that it will work for you too.

    How do I correlate this to Eleanor Roosevelt’s quote?

    “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent”, well let’s see. Say, you are very unhappy with your current job. You’ve shared this with a friend or someone close and the response you received was, “stay where you are, it will be hard for you to change careers now”. “Changing jobs means starting over, you don’t want to start over do you?”

    Now, I’m not saying those people are bad people. Those responses are signs of them caring for you. They don’t want you to suffer in the end. Which is valid.

    But the choice of words is not empowering. Sadly, they are demotivating. And if you are not being careful, they can be crippling.

    Mrs. Roosevelt’s quote applies to it because you will hear demotivating words. Crippling words. Those words will make you feel incapable. Or inferior even and at the end of the day, it is your choice if you will let those words be applied to you and your life.

    Starting over is not a bad thing. May that be personal or professional. I have started over many times in my young life. And so far, I have learned that it wasn’t so bad at all. I have learned a lot. And I’ve come to a realization that starting over shows you how flexible you can be. And my secret, every time I start over, I start using the knowledge that I already have. So, technically, it is not starting over. It is entering a new chapter.

    And what do you need to enter a new chapter in your life? “Courage”

    Always remember, if you have that burning desire, do not be afraid to listen to it and do what you need to do to take that path.

    You are what you are meant to be already.

    “You are what you are meant to be” explained

    Now, I need your full attention because I wanted you to get what I meant by this.

    It is mind-blowing. Do you know that a child is born with his or her higher self?

    What? I know, I said that too.

    It means that you are what you are meant to be the moment you are born.

    Unfortunately, you don’t know what you are meant to be until you have your clarity moment. Why? Because the first 7 years of your childhood are about learning and absorbing. And those are; your parent’s values, traditions, environment, etc. So, you become the average of all those things. And that is not who you are meant to be.

    You develop fears. Limiting beliefs. Traumas. Your own values. Your ways. That are not entirely yours.

    And then, you go through your journey of being who you want to be. I hate to break it to you, you were misled. Once you found clarity, the journey will be, finding who you are.

    It is inside you. You are what you are meant to be, just needed to wake up. You just have to bring it out of you.

    Also have the courage to:

    • Go through the journey
    • Break down walls and barriers
    • Start the healing process
    • Unlearn limiting beliefs

    It sounds like a lot of work. But as you peel off every skin. Remove all the unnecessary parts. You will see your higher self again.

    So the next time you have a burning desire to change. Burning desire to do something. Don’t shrug it off. Face it. Develop the courage to explore it. That is your inner self guiding you.

    And when you do, this will result in you meeting the person you are meant to be.

    I hope you found value in this pep talk and I would love for you to share this with someone who may need to read it.

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    Always remember…

    Be bold,

    …radiant,

    …confidently YOU!