Ernie O Dacumos Are you tired of feeling like a victim? Feeling helpless and wishing that things would change? Well, you’re in for a treat as I will share three ways how to switch from a victim to a victor mindset.
I am sharing these three things not to question you, or belittle you. At least have trust that I am sharing these three things because I wanted to empower you! I have full confidence in you and that if you have applied these three things first, you will be on your way to having a victor mentality.
How to switch from a Victim to Victor Mindset
- Accept that life is hard
- Realize that things happen for you not to you
- You always have a choice
Accept that life is hard
Life is difficult – Don’t make it harder for yourself
John C. Maxwell
It was a weird thing to hear this quote from my mentor John C. Maxwell, Life is difficult, don’t make it harder for yourself. I am not going to lie, there have been many occasions when I had a victim mentality. Questioning why everything has to be so difficult. Why can’t I just have an easy ticket to success? And my favorite, Why am I doing this?
Those are moments of weakness. But when I heard Papa John’s quote (yes, we call Dr. John C. Maxwell, Papa John), it changed the direction for me. Life is difficult, that is the reality. If it was easy, then we wouldn’t appreciate life. If it was a breeze, then we wouldn’t see the value of living life.
So, I challenge you to make a decision today to accept that life is difficult. Once you have accepted it, then everything else is easier. Again, it’s not how many times you get knocked down, because life will throw curve balls at you. What matters is what you do once it’s in front of you and this is what makes you a victor. Feel free to read my post, “Self-belief is all you need” to enhance this theory.
Realize that everything happens for you not to you
Life is simple. Everything happens for you not to you.
Byron Katie
This was huge for me.
My victim mentality was so apparent before that I always ask myself, “Why is this happening ‘to’ me?!?”
You can relate to it but let me share that my dear you are not a victim. I wish I remembered where this knowledge came from. But I have learned that ‘lessons in life will be repeated until they are learned.’ You can read that again.
You may be wondering what it means. Well, it means that every hurdle, difficulty, or challenge you face in life will keep repeating. Until you learn the lesson behind it. Which is why the quote by Byron Katie was very powerful.
Let me give you an example. You experience this fear of getting hurt in a relationship because you were hurt in the past. Yet, you noticed that you keep attracting the same type of men who ends up cheating on you or hurting you. In this scenario, you will keep attracting the same type of men until you learned a lesson. The lesson could be; having more self-confidence. Knowing your boundaries, and being clear about the type of relationship you deserve.
So, I challenge you. If you encounter a problem that keeps repeating itself, realize that there is a lesson behind it. It is a matter of recognizing it and being curious about what the lesson might be.
You always have a choice, choose to be a Victor
I wanted to give you a reality check, YOU.ARE.NOT. A.VICTIM! Another trait of having a victim mentality is accepting that you are a victim. But gorgeous, I am here to tell you that you are not. And at the end of the day, You can choose! Instead of being a victim, you can choose to be a victor.
You always have a choice of path to take. It’s up to you if the path that you are currently on is something that you wanted to settle in. Or if you are willing to make a change.
I get it, I do. You may be saying that it is easier said than done Ernie. Remember the first step? I said, Accept that life is difficult. It will always be difficult, but you have a choice to stay in misery; depressed, unmotivated, or stuck, that you are in. Or you can choose to rise up from that occasion. Seek help, motivate yourself, or help yourself to feel unstuck. My advice… choose what is good for you!
So, there you have it gorgeous! Ways on how to switch from Victim to Victor Mindset. And if you found value in this blog post, please share it with others, it’s the only way we can spread the knowledge.
Always remember be…
Bold
Radiant
Confidently You!
