Ahhh, the word itself used to make me cringe. For years, it was something I thought I will never have.
I am from a third-world country who moved to the United States when I was 17 years old. The language used here is English, which is not my native language. and to be quite honest, something I struggled to understand when uttered by the residents in this country. If that does not intimidate a young woman, enough?
I had no confidence in myself and felt small in such a big world.
It is not until I heard from a well-known motivational speaker, Mel Robbins that Confidence is not a personality trait, it is a skill! And one thing about skill, it is something one can learn.
Mel Robbins talked about The Competent Confidence Loop. It is about acting, improving from that action can then build competence, once it is repeated, we develop self-belief, which later boosts confidence.
It sounds so simple, right?
Confidence has a lot of definitions but in its entirety, confidence to me is having the courage to act despite fears and limiting beliefs. And I have applied this definition in everything I do, ever since.
“Okay, easier said than done”, you may comment with your eyes rolling. I understand gorgeous. I did the same exact thing and to tell you the truth, gathering the courage did not happen overnight. Up to this day, I still try to gather the courage to even write this blog, let alone share it with ambitious women like you.
I have provided a few tips on how to start building your confidence with these 5 Ds:
- Do what your intuition says:
If your first thought says you wanted to go after a certain task, goal, or whatever the case may be, follow it!
- Do not negotiate with yourself:
Analysis paralysis is what we call it. Having a strong desire to do something but your mind comes in and tells you what could go wrong, the answer is no! Do not negotiate!
- Do it:
You know when you watch an action movie where the hero(s) attacks the enemy headquarters with guns blazing? Do exactly that, dive into that task with all you’ve got. It does not matter if you have it all figured out yet, just do!
- Do it again:
Remember the competence confidence loop? Repetition is key, it’s okay to make mistakes, make the mistakes fast, but learn from those mistakes.
- Do celebrate yourself
Gorgeous, we are not meant to suffer or work all the time. Celebrate your accomplishments, even the mistakes, and the lesson learned from them, it is called progress. The more you acknowledge it, the more you will feel confident to do more and look forward to celebrating. Now, I am not saying do an extravagant celebration, it can be small too. Do a spa day, buy yourself a book, take a day off, whatever will fill your soul and make you happy.
Now that you have the initial tricks on how to dive into creating or learning to have confidence. I challenge you to apply them every time you have a task at hand. Try it even on the smallest task that you have been putting off. I assure you, you will feel fulfilled afterward.
Would you like me to keep you in on a little secret? Notice that each step starts with the word “Do” because that is the main key- taking action.
We can think, hope, wish, plan all day, but no action will not help us progress. Now, the ball is in your court, let’s see how you will take the shot. Comment below. Until next time dear.
You are beautiful, you are worthy and most of all, YOU ARE POWERFUL!